Teeth. Aquarium. Answers

We made it one month! OK, so it hasn't really been that hard, but I still have been unsure about how long we could survive in such close quarters. And since we are plugging along just fine, there are no plans yet for me and the kids to leave.

 

This week has been one of excitement. Not all of it good, unfortunately. Most of you probably saw on Facebook that James is going to need a little dental work done. Laila was mad at him for something so she scratched his leg, which made him made so he decided to get revenge by picking her up and body slamming her onto the bed. At the last second, he realized that was a really mean thing to day so he flipped around so that she would land on top of him and when they hit the bed her head bounced off his mouth. I was a little upset about his teeth, but very proud of him for making the right decision. He sometimes has a hard time thinking beyond himself, so that fact that he was worried not only about hurting Laila, but changed his action in the heat of the moment, was actually a pretty big deal. He's handling things quite a bit better today, but when the incident first happened he was pretty distraught about how his teeth now look. The turning point was when Josh told him about how he chipped his tooth as a kid. So now that he's like dad, it's not so big of a deal.

 

 

As uneventful things go, we have been taking morning walks to get some blood flowing before we sit down for school work.

On Saturday there was a pretty good chance of rain, so instead of the beach we decided to check out the Tampa aquarium. The kids had a great time, and since a season pass was not much more than going one time, we bought the pass and will be able to go several more times before we leave. When we left the aquarium it was pouring down rain. Poor Josh had to run through it quite a ways to get the car and then drive back to get us.

This picture makes her look way too grown up for my liking!

How awesome of a picture is this!

Do you see me and Josh in the picture as well?

The most exciting part of this week for me is that after many prayers, I feel like I have finally been guided to some big answers about James. He has come a long way these past few months, but Josh and I have still felt like there was something we were missing. He seems like a normal active boy to most observers, but at home we have noticed a few things that caused us some concern. He constantly puts non food items in his mouth, when he gets frustrated he will thrash his head around, he doesn't understand the concept of personal space, and several other little things that on their own wouldn't be alarming, but added together didn't seem right. We have talked about getting him evaluated, but weren't really sure what for, or how to go about it. Then, a few days ago a friend on Facebook posted something about how letting her son with SPD sleep with a white noise app and headphones had finally helped him sleep through the night. (another of James' problems) That post triggered a memory of something she had said to me several months ago about how James seemed a lot like her son and that I should check into Sensory Processing Disorder. My cousin Amy had also recently posted on Facebook that her son had been diagnosed with SPD so I decided I should at least read something about it. I went straight to Barnes and Noble that afternoon and bought The Out of Sync Child and within the first two chapters, I already felt like so many of my questions had been answered. Of course, we will have to have him professionally evaluated to make sure, but I can say with 99% certainty that James has a mild case of SPD. There are several different types, but he is a sensory seeker. Basically his brain isn't getting all the sensory messages that his body is sending to it, so it tells hims "I need more!" He chews on things, stands upside down, squeezes me really tight all day long, sticks his hand in the wax warmer every time he walks by it even though he has been repeatedly told not to, and talks with a loud voice in inappropriate situations, to satisfy his brains craving for stimulation. It also explains a lot about THIS post! Apparently, sensory seekers can be hard to potty train because they might like the feeling of a loaded diaper or underwear! I haven't finished the book yet, and I know there is going to be a lot more learning that needs to happen both for him and me and Josh, but I'm so happy that we finally have a way to help him. In just a few days we've already discovered a few tricks, like letting him chew gum while he has to sit still for school work, that have made a difference. I can't tell you how relieved I feel to finally have some answers, and to know that his behavioural problems aren't because of anything I did wrong as a parent.

Next week we are hoping for sunshine instead of rain. The beach is calling to us!

Lesson Learned...maybe

Three years ago I posted this story about a cute little kindergarten boy and his scarecrow day outfit. I forgot about it until the night before and then somehow managed to pull together a pretty darn good costume. Just sayin. Anyway, my mom's comment was "Save it because Macy will need it in a few years."

Guess what I did not do and guess what I remembered last night! Yup, today was scarecrow day again. With no saved costume and no more energy I had to come up with something that Macy would be excited to wear to school. Fortunately, she did not want any straw because it might be itchy and we found an old shirt in James clothes pile that she was pretty excited about. All I really had to do was sew a few patches of fabric on her jean skirt and then tie some raffia in her hair as her "hat."

She does make the cutest little scarecrow girl I have ever seen.

I'm actually really glad that I didn't go all out again, because on Fridays I go to Macy's class and put together the kid's folders with all their work from the week, and there were only a few kids that had dressed up. And most of the other kids were just wearing either a plaid shirt or a straw hat. I guess James was probably way over done his year.

And this has nothing to do with scarecrows, but it did happen today also, so I'm caboosing it on. Macy's teacher is the same one that James had and she is really great about letting the siblings come to class to visit or help out. When I told her that James was homeschooling she asked me to bring him along with me on Fridays. Last week he just helped me put together the folders, but this week she asked him to check some counting books the kids had done and then stamp them. Then, she asked him if he would mind reading a book to the class. I honestly didn't think he would say yes, but he did and it was so sweet. I got a little emotional watching him because I am just so proud of him and how far he has come not just in school work but in his confidence. I could tell that he felt pretty proud of himself after as well, especially when the teacher said he was now the designated Friday reader.

Less structure, more slime

I'm sure most of you have heard by now, but in case your not up to date on the exciting details of our lives, I have decided to home school James. I've written a lot about the back story on my other blog here, but I want to write more of the personal details here. There are so many things I don't want to forget and I want James to be able to read about them someday.

 

The decision to home school James took me all of 3 seconds when I finally allowed myself to accept that it was possible. Or really, to accept that I could possibly handle it. I asked James right away if he would be interested in learning at home and without hesitation he said "Yes!"

I asked him on a Monday if he wanted to home school and without much preparation we started the next day. I honestly had no idea what to expect on our first morning, but I was preparing myself for the worst. James hadn't exactly been the easiest child to work with in the past and I pretty much dreaded the kids coming home from school everyday simply because I would have to help him with (force him to do) homework. I was sure that he would argue with me when I asked him to do his work, and I was almost prepared for him to beg me to let him go back to school after the first day. My goal however was to make it to Christmas. I was hoping that by then that I would see results, and that those results would compel me to keep going.

I prayed a lot the night before we started about whether or not this really was what was best for James, and for myself to have what it took to be his teacher. I will admit I didn't have that overwhelming burning of peace, but I did feel calm, and that was enough for me to move forward.

If I had felt that my prayers had not been answered as fully as I would have liked the night before, I was immediately humbled and grateful when James woke up more cheerful than I had ever seen him on a school day. And then I asked him to help Laila  get cereal for breakfast and his answer was "sure mom." I honestly can't recall if he had ever responded like that before to a request for help. What I can tell you is that his normal response would have been to either pretend like he didn't hear me at all or whine and ask "why do I have to do it?"

He even did all his school work without complaint and at the end of the day said "home school is awesome!"

After the first day I was excited about how things had gone, but still had my doubts. I thought maybe the excitement of staying home would wear off after a few days and he would be back to his normal self, but the changes in him over the last few weeks continue to amaze me and I am finally starting to realize that he is just now getting back to his normal self. He is finally the happy boy I remember.

 He continues to say "sure mom" just about any time I ask him to do something. He has made enormous strides in his reading because he finally cares about doing it right and even sets goals on his own to get all the words on the pages right. He has been incredibly affectionate to not just me, but to his sisters. On Samm's birthday he could not stop telling her what a great sister she is and even offered to play whatever she wanted that day. (showing consideration for other people's feelings is a huge step that I am so excited about!) He continues to wake up happy and ready for school each morning, and in our prayer together one morning after we had read from the Book of Mormon reader, he said "please help me to be like Nephi so I can always be righteous." This one especially had me on my own knees later that day giving thanks, because just a few months ago he told me that he did not want to go on a mission when he got older.

There are still days that are mentally and physically exhausting for me. Today was especially hard, because we sat at home all day yesterday listening to General conference so he was a little wound up with energy. The beautiful thing about being at home though is that we can take as many breaks as we need and when he is bouncing off the walls I can send him outside with instructions to bounce 100 times on his pogo stick before he comes back inside. We can also make slime anytime we want!

Even with all the incredible changes I've seen in James, what amazes me most is the evidence that Heavenly Father is watching out for us. He is making it possible for me to give James exactly what he needs right now and still manage all the other things in my life. Before homeschooling I felt like I was loosing the juggling act that was my life. I've cried many times to Josh about how overwhelmed I felt just from my day to day responsibilities and how I couldn't do it all. I certainly don't still do it "all" now every day, but somehow in the same number of hours as I always had before, I am able to educate my son, maintain a somewhat orderly home, take on as many if not more hair appointments, add a second church calling, watch a friends little girl twice a week, and help out in Macy's classroom every Friday.

On my own, none of this would be possible, but I know that through Him all things are possible. I can let go of selfish desires and find joy in devoting myself to teaching James each day, and my weaknesses (time management) can become my strength.

I never in a million years thought that I would be a home school mom, but I am so excited about what James and I are doing right now, and I can't wait to see how he continues to grow and mature throughout the course of this year.

I'm always the outfielder

Cross your fingers, knock on wood, and hold your breath. I think James has found his sport. He loves Baseball! Well, he loves batting. That's why I'm holding my breath. We've been playing in the backyard non stop all week but he doesn't start his official practice at the YMCA until Tuesday. I'm hoping he still loves it even when he has to stand out in the field.

With all the ball retrieving I'm doing, I really should have a glove. I'm not a bad pitcher though either!

Kid Quotes

The best part of my day is when one of the kids says something so funny that I can't wait for Josh to get home so I can tell him. Sadly, I keep forgetting to record them here so that one day they can read them and laugh also. I'm recommitting myself right now to doing better, so here are a few from this week.
'

I was driving in Josh's car with Macy a few days ago when she said "Dad has really awesome music in his car, huh?"

I replied with a half hearted "uh huh"

And then she said "I don't like awesome music because it's too loud and screechy. I'm a girl so I like calm music."

Oh man, then I started laughing because she obviously has picked up on the fact that mom does not like loud music and dad does.

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Just this afternoon Josh walked in the door right after the kids got home from school which is very unusual. He mentioned that he had an hour before he was officially on call and when I asked what he was going to do with his free hour he said that he was going to bond with his son.

James was standing next to us and asked "what's bonding?"

So I told him that basically it meant that dad was going to rough him up a little and that he would cry, but that they would become better friends because of it.

Without even hesitating he said "But I'm already his friend!"

James' Special Day

It has been an exciting week at our house. On Wednesday night Josh's sister Stacey and her family drove into town to spend a few days with us. Thursday morning Josh, Samm, and James helped their team solidify the annual Turkey bowl trophy for the 2nd year in a row (winning that title is a huge deal to Samm) We had a delicious Thanksgiving dinner even though I forgot about the stuffing. Seriously. How do you forget about the stuffing on Thanksgiving! And then we stuffed ourselves with pie and ice cream in celebration of my main man turning 8! I'm sorry James, but this is the only picture I have from your party. Please forgive me! 

 

On Saturday James and his friend Isaac were both baptized, and it was a wonderful but emotional day! In a good way. I was so proud of James. 

I only have one picture of Josh and James in all white, but James has his eyes closed so you have to settle for one with me in it also. Josh's pants were a little on the snug side, so he made sure that James stood in front of him. I know Josh was uncomfortable, but I couldn't stop giggling. Order new white pants is now on the top of my to do list!

James being a goof ball

Macy likes to salute for pictures now. I don't know why.

We were so happy to have Stacey and Jason and their girls with us for this special day and very grateful that they made the drive!

Our Son the B Boy



Never in a million years would I have ever guessed that James would do anything other than play sports. I always assumed that he would be a football player like his dad. It's not that I was against him pursuing other interests, it's just that Rollins boys play football. Plain and simple.

 

It has also been pretty evident for some time though that he takes more after me in his physical makeup than he does Josh, which doesn't exactly scream football player. He also hasn't ever really showed an extreme interest in sports outside of playing in the backyard as a family.

 

About a year ago he started doing head stands All. The. Time. He got so good at them that we suggested he try spinning on his head just to challenge him a little. One day after he had become pretty good at spinning in a complete circle we decided to look at break dancing videos on you tube so he could see all the cool stuff that they do. James was hooked. When we told him that we had found a place that offered break dancing classes for boys he went right up to his room and changed his clothes because he wanted to start right that second.

 

Unfortunately we didn't have the money for it right then but told him that when we got our house sold we would look into it.

 

Three weeks ago was his first class and it was so cute how excited and nervous he was all at the same time. We actually just went to check it out on the first day and told him that he could decide whether or not he wanted to sign up. After class he came running out with the biggest smile on his face and said "I want to sign up right now!"

 

We are absolutely thrilled that he finally found something he loves other than video games and I can already seen the change that this has made in his confidence. Most of the other kids were still learning how to do head stands when he started so the fact that he could already spin on his head made him feel really special. Then, just this past Monday he told me very excitedly on the way to class that they were going to learn how to do back flips! Honestly, I was thinking there was no way they were actually going to be learning that but I didn't say that to him.



 

So, they were exactly learning back flips, but I was shocked that he really was teaching them back hand springs. James once again was the best one in the class because he has absolutely no fear. His teacher explained to him what he was going to do and then James said "OK" and jumped backwards. Then his teacher had him do it again several times in a row so that the other kids could see exactly what to do. I know it seems silly, but I was so proud of him!

 

 

Laila loves his break dancing class too. She hears the music start and heads straight to the door to watch and pretty much stays there for the entire 45 minutes.

 

And you should know that I already have big plans to see my B Boy James on So You Think You Can Dance someday!

Dancing Queen

Before you start to think this has turned into the Laila blog, I do have one funny thing to share from James.

On our way home tonight James said "For Christmas, I'm going to ask for a real force field." I said "OK" and didn't think much of it, but Macy wanted to know why, so he explained that he wants it so dad cant beat him up anymore. Um. Yes. So. every once in a while I tell Josh that the kids need to be roughed up a little and it usually ends in tears, but it's good for them! Apparently James does not agree however.

Alright, now on to the Laila part. She is by far our most serious child...until you turn on the music! I took the kids to skate night tonight and was a little worried about how to keep Laila entertained, but she had a blast! She ended up entertaining the lady sitting next to us.

They really do love each other

I wish I had lots of exciting things to blog about and great pictures to show, but I don't. I have been so busy the last few weeks trying to help Samm make hair bows for a fundraiser and make her a dress and make James a tie for his class play. I still have a long way to go on the dress and bows, but I did finish James' tie yesterday and I couldn't be more thrilled with the way it turned out! I didn't really need to make him one, he just needed a tie that was either red, white, or blue, but I was so proud of him for getting the lead role of Mr. Freedom, that I wanted to make him something special. I love a boy in a white shirt and tie!

And as I was doing my final tuck in of all the kids tonight I happened to over hear this conversation between James and Samm

James "Sometimes when you are mean to me in my life I say something in my head, but I don't want to tell you because you will cry."

Samm "It's OK. You can tell me. I won't cry."

James "I say I hate you."

Samm "I know, I say the same thing. But then we apologize and we regret what we said."

James "OK. Can you read me a chapter of your book?"

I have no idea why he felt the need to tell her that since I didn't notice them fighting today, but it was so sweet the way they were talking to each other. Made my heart feel glad.

Car Conversations...we're in trouble

Last night the kids and I were on our way to the ward talent show when out of no where James says "OK guys, you can't tell ANYONE, but in Mrs. (?'s) class, I have a crush on Ava."

Me "Why do you have a crush on Ava?"
James "Because she has lipstick, and she's beautiful, and she talks beautiful, and she has beautiful   hair." (pauses for a second) "And I can see inside her and her spirit looks really fun!"

Me "So she wears lipstick huh?"
James "Ya, but I can't ask her to marry me because when I'm ten we are moving."

What is a mother to do!

Gretel and a jolly rancher hat

Last night we finally got to watch Samm in her school play. She did a great job of course and loved every second of it. We did video tape it for the grandparents, but unfortunately we are still using our ancient laptop and I think it would take at least 24 hours to load. So for now, here are a few shots of her in action.

And today happened to be the 100th day of school and James was supposed to make a hat with 100 things on it so we made a jolly rancher hat. I even let James use the hot glue gun! It was a pretty awesome, but heavy hat.

King James is 7!

When James was around 2 and we lived in Oklahoma, the young men in our ward absolutely LOVED him. They all called him King James and would make him give them first pumps as he walked down the hall. In fact, they loved him so much that one day I went to pick him up from nursery, but he wasn't there, so I went to find Josh, assuming that he had already grabbed him. What I found out though was that the young men had gone in and got him and taken him to class with them.

He may not be my little king James anymore, but he's still my most favorite boy in the whole world!

No, the cupcake doesn't smell bad. He's trying not to accidentally blow out the candles while we sing

We already have about a million light sabers at our house...

but none of them light up and make sounds like a real Jedi light saber, so now we have one million and one!

James to Grandma

"I love to kiss your arms because it feels like the skin is melting on my lips."

Toothless

He's even handsome with a hole in his mouth and marker on his cheek, which is the sign of a productive day at school!

How we are all feeling right now

Josh was on call Friday, is on call tonight, and will be on call again on Tuesday.  We were lucky enough today that he was able to come home for a few hours and even have dinner with us before the dreaded beeping started, but it is still hard every time he has to go in.

This evening as he was kissing us all goodbye, James said "I wish you weren't a doctor dad, I wish you were a stay at home person."

Talk about pulling at your parent heart strings!

Mr. Fashion

• By the time James was 3 and could completely dress himself I would find him in different outfits all day long.
• Last week I took him to get some school clothes and after 15 minutes of staring at t-shirts I finally told him he had 10 seconds to pick one or I was checking out and he wouldn't get any. (The above photo is the shirt that caused him so much decision making anguish)
• Today we took the kids to get school shoes and after several suggestions from Dad that were all too this or that he finally asked James "Well, which ones do you want?" James immediately went to the most expensive pair of tennis shoes and stated "I want these ones!" (A pair of Above The Rim basketball shoes) Lucky for James Dad is a kids shoe buying novice and didn't bother to look at the price, just assuming that all shoes at Payless were $15 or less. They are NOT!
• I have only known one other boy in my life that is more particular about the clothes he wears, which is why we have affectionately started calling James, Uncle Keith!  

Baseball Vs. Pei Wei

On Saturday one of our neighbor girls was having a Birthday party that she invited our kids to. It was a princess party though so we suggested to James that the girls go to the party and he could go with Dad to do some boy stuff. He decided the boy stuff would be better and even let me tag along for a while, even though I think he really didn't want me to.

James has suddenly become very interested in baseball so we took him to a batting cage to let him hit some baseballs. Baseball is probably my least favorite sport to watch, but if it is the sport my son loves, than I'm willing to give it a try.

After the batting cages we were on our way into Cold Stone when Josh got a text from one of his attending doctors. He has season tickets to the Detroit Tigers game but wasn't going to make it to the game that evening and the first person to respond could have his tickets. Josh texted back right away and scored him and James two seats 7 rows behind home plate.

After the girls came home from the birthday party we decided that we weren't going to just sit at home bored, so we went out to do some back to school shopping and had dinner at Pei Wei per Samm's request.

This girl loves her lo mein!

We didn't get much in the way of school clothes other than some pants and a few shirts, but we did have a post shopping fashion show once we got home. Sadly, I forgot to take pictures, but it did bring back some good memories of back to school shopping with my sisters.

There's a slight Harry Potter obsession going on at our house right now

I actually had my heart set on him being He-Man for Halloween, but today he was giving me detailed instructions on how to make him a real Harry Potter costume. Apparently Dad's old glasses, a batman cape and a pencil just won't cut it for the big day.

No couch potatoes in this house!

(picture taken at the science center nutrition exhibit)

Josh and I have really started feeling like we need to teach our kids a little bit more about working hard. We make them do little chores during the week and they have a slightly longer list on Saturday mornings, but I think as far as slave driving goes, they have it pretty easy.

So, even though I didn't remember signing up to clean the church this Saturday I was glad when they reminded me. And honestly the kids were too. They love cleaning the church and as soon as we walk in they run and get the big rolling trash can so they can walk and around empty all the smaller trash cans. Once that's over they usually keep busy by cleaning chalk boards and dusting.

I walked around the corner to find Macy hard at work and being careful to not get any dust in her eyes!

After the kids and I were finished at the church we got a surprise phone call from Dad saying he was home from the hospital so we loaded up together and went to the Science Center.

After the Science Center, there was still more work to be done at home. The girls helped me inside, while James got his first lesson in mowing the lawn. Part of me felt sorry for him, but it was nice to see him working so hard. And the mower is self propelled so all he had to do was push down on the bar.

I think James was pretty proud of himself once he finished, but the poor kid doesn't realize how many more lawns are in his future!

James Quote

Last night the kids were messing around with a microphone so I asked James to sing a song and he told me "Mom, singing is not my sport!"